Recently I was having breakfast with a friend and we were conversing on a range of topics. Like many recent discussions, the conversation included all of the relevant topics of the day including the global financial meltdown and the impact on all of us. We also discussed mutual friends, family experiences and a mutual interest in books. (He recommended an excellent book, The Long Gray Line: The American Journey of West Point's Class of 1966 by Rick Atkinson – definitely added to my reading list). The normal fare of relationship building and connections through common interest and perspective.
In the course of our conversation he related a story about an annual fishing trip he takes with a group of friends. While not an avid fisherman, he looks forward to this trip because of the value he places on the relationships with the other participants. The nature of the location forces the group to completely disconnect from our electronic world and focus on only a few things. Among these are the other participants, the river, the fish, the scenery, the weather and the experience created by the guide company. In this simple story, I found great inspiration for facing the challenges of these times.
The first lesson relates to the value of being present. Technology is a distraction. How many times in a day am I distracted by the intrusion of technology? When I started my career, I dealt with a ringing telephone, daily mail, infrequent faxes and the coworker with a question. This amounted to a finite number of interruptions and distractions. Today, the phone still rings, the mail is still delivered (though there is not much), the faxes are few and far between, also I may interact with a few more of my coworkers - not too bad…except for that little mailbox that constantly appears on my computer. The entire planet now has access to my attention and all it takes is a tiny envelope. From requests to delivery of information to offers of prosperity, the mailbox is constantly shouting at me for attention. I am drawn into this hypnotic trance that requires me to inevitably peak and frequently act. Sometimes I just want to see what the nature of the message might be, others times, I feel compelled to act immediately. Occasionally these glances last only a few seconds, others require immediate, thoughtful attention. All eat away at the day. On some days this box tantalizes me over 100 times. Would you let people interrupt you 100 times a day for just a few seconds? What is the consequence of allowing this to happen? At the very least, this is a substantial inhibitor to being present for more important matters. The absence of this distraction has profound and positive benefits – particularly when building relationships. So as this band of brothers drifts downstream their disconnection allows them to be present with each other and the benefits are profound. They know each other in ways that are nearly impossible in an electronic world. Do I give my friends, family, coworkers the same?
The second lesson is directly related to the global financial meltdown. I recall my sense of doom and gloom when the stock market was plummeting, mortgages were under water and pillars of American Enterprise were dying or too large to fail. As a side note, it is funny how a little time allows for better perspective on situations. O.K., back to fishing. My new friend was telling me that fishing is not a passion; however, he would not miss this trip because the guide they use is so exceptional. For the entirety of their trip, every detail is planned and nothing is taken for granted. The gear is waiting and in excellent working order, the food is exceptional, the campsites are preplanned and well organized – I mean, everything has been considered and delivered with skill and to a very high standard.
On one trip, the weather did not cooperate, so the fishing conditions were less than satisfactory. Faced with a choice of staying on a small part of the route where there was some chance for fish or drifting down the entire route the group chose the entire route. They wanted their daily campsites, the excellent food, the variety of the terrain, the natural beauty of the route. They wanted that more than the fishing. And here is the interesting part – the guide wasn’t that surprised. He related a lesson he learned to my friend that really rings true. He learned that he couldn’t control the weather, the fishing conditions, the river, the participants or the fish – he could only control the experience. Now that got me to thinking. What can we control and when do we need to accept our lack of control. In our business, we can’t control the economy, or rates, our clients, or our competition. We control only our own behavior. The daily activities we take to retain and obtain our clients is the only thing we control. Do our clients rave about their experience? One has to wonder and continually challenge ourselves to make that experience the most pleasing it can be by accounting for every detail. One good way is to ignore the parts we can’t control and focus on the things we can. Just like the guide who learned long ago that most of the elements were outside his control, so he focuses on what matters and what he can control.
Good advice for the times.
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